HI! my name is Trig trigonometry. I love triangles. They're the best shape on this planet. Triangles rock my world. Also, I like to go buy dried mango peels from the cornerstore across the street from my mansion. I live in a mansion in Sacramento, California. I live in my mansion with my 13 sisters and 11 brothers. I have 6 pets. My first pet that I ever bought was a giraffe. His name is Moocho, and he eats the leaves off trees and spits them out all over the gardener. My second pet is a turtle. Her name is Dog. Dog does nothing much all day. I have a feeling that she might be dead. My third pet is the colony of grenades that I planted under my pillow two years ago. Each grenade has a name. There are 349349 of them. My fourth pet is a rhinoceros. His name is Crud. I got him for Christmas. I told Santa that I wanted a Hippopotamus for Christmas, but he gave me a rhinoceros instead. I hate Santa. My fifth pet is a termite. Her name is James. She is bright pink with green polka dots. (I painted them on her). She fell down my chimney on March 22nd, 1902, and I've kept her ever since. My sixth pet is a rather demented buffalo. His name is Jork, (after my eldest brother). I found him swimming in the pool in the Fairmont Kea Lani, in Maui, Hawaii, yesterday. As soon as he saw me, he started following me around like a shadow. I'm best at spending money. I also own a casino in Chicago, a squash court in Los Angeles, and a cotton plantation in Alabama. I have several jobs. On Mondays, Fridays and Saturdays, I am a leaf blower. I blow piles of leaves at people I don't like. On Tuesdays and Thursdays, I am a dishwasher at the KEG. I rinse the plates, scrub them with toothbrushes and toothpaste, then squeeze some shampoo on it, and hand it over to the chef, who then puts slabs of raw beef on it, and serves it. It is a very exciting process. On Wednesdays, I am an alien breeder. I grow the aliens on Mars, with the help of my assistent. Then I import them to people on earth who order aliens. SO that's why you may see green creatures roaming your backyard. If you want to order one, go to www.ebay.com, and there you go! On Sundays, I work for the government of China. I polish the Great Wall with my tongue. So, there you have it. That's my life.