Bejan Kashani, father of Rashid Kashani, April Kashani and Sarah Kashani, was born in 1947 in southern Iran. He was rumoured to be the heir to the throne of an unknown country called Nebelon. This rumour was propagated primarily via his second wife's Aunt, Eva Jubinville of St. Paul Alberta, who did not know much about world geography. Apparently abdicating this throne in 1962, Kashani opted for completion of boarding school where he was routinely beaten by prefects (teaching assistants who were senior students) and eventually came to Canada...

Potential time lines for Kashani's life to date:

1946 - conception during a vernal equinox party 1947 - born 1947 - 1962 - grooming period to take throne 1962 - abdicates throne 1967-72 - joins fraternity (name withheld) at University of McGill, manages to get Biochemistry degree 1972 - Biochemistry degree destroyed by infant son 1972-74 Completion of BComm at University of Alberta 1974 - BComm degree destroyed by 3 yr old son 1974 - son not seen in public for a while 1972-2004 Works for City of Edmonton, makes claims like inventing the phrases "Don't go there" and "Talk to the hand" 2005 - present retired to ?? whereabouts unknown, last seen at the patent office attempting to patent both the semi-colon and question mark as his own inventions